Logic, Love & Self-Limiting Beliefs

32) Who I get to be for myself and for others, is entirely up to me

I used to think I wanted people to get me. I wanted people to truly understand me. Honestly, I have come to learn, while that has tremendous benefits, it’s not the most essential ingredient for a loving relationship.  At the very least it is not the first essential ingredient. “Listening” certainly has to come before “Understanding” can even take place.

The mind always wants to make and create logic out of everything. But, honestly we as people aren’t designed to be logical. We actually are designed to push the limits of life and redefine what it means to be human.

To try and apply logic to Love - would simply be way too self-limiting.

What I look for in a lover or friend or a workmate or a teammate, is someone who is willing to work through things with me. I want someone who is at times able to toss logic aside and just dance in the conversation with me. Especially those uncomfortable and confronting conversations! 

Part of what makes us human, is that in the moment the statement above is so simple and so freeing and so easy. Yet, humans aren’t designed to be simple. We are complicated creatures with thoughts and ideas about the world. We have our own personal histories, and past traumas, (some of which we inherited).

I write this not because I have some grand insight on humanity. And even if I did, that insight wasn’t discovered by pure bliss and joy. Rather it was discovered by pain and loss, and sometimes conversations that escalated into conflict.

The heartbreak I have experienced isn’t some grand epiphany. Even if it is, the only way it can actually serve me is if I actually loved like my life depended on it.

And when it comes to love, all logic goes out the window.

One thing about love is:  Real love is not self-limiting. Real love fosters love in everyone around you. The love I feel, the love I spread, the love I have for myself, the love I have for others, knows no limits. 

I choose love not because of logic. I choose love, because my life depends on it.